Your Local Neighbourhood Criminologist

Attention people in my neighbourhood:

If you do something stupid like have a loud, rowdy party with drunk people arguing, throwing bottles down the street, or just some drunk broad yelling like she's on a bull at a rodeo: I WILL CALL THE COPS AND REPORT YOU.

You all know I'm a criminologist and was hit by a drunk driver, so don't look surprised when the squad car pulls up.